Friday, June 19, 2020

Who's in Your Team?


Some years ago, I wrote the blog article ‘Choose your Pregnancy and Birth Team.’ As you can guess from the title, this was aimed at pregnancy, however I have recently begun to realise that the concept of this is actually relevant to everyone. My original post was all about making sure you utilise the right people for you throughout your pregnancy. It is that concept that I want to harness now and encourage you all to do the same. Who is in your support team?

If you have been following my blogs, you have probably already taken the springboard for your healthy habits and started on your health goals. Having the right team around you is vital, and I am going to give my original example here: When my eldest son was born, I had planned to go to a midwife-led birthing centre; I wanted everything as natural as can be. I had read a few books and done a bit of research myself and thought that was enough. I made a big mistake; I didn’t look for or find anyone to help me achieve this. I thought that as that was my wish it would somehow happen, that hospital doctors, consultants, midwives, would all be on board with this because I had noted in my birth plan that I wanted a natural birth. I hadn’t outlined my vision to them either and that was another mistake. Let’s face it: people’s ideas and understandings can vary greatly and the word natural can mean different things to different people. When I didn’t get the support I was expecting it left me feeling alone in an environment I did not want to be in. Everything I wanted was a constant battle of trying to make myself heard. 

Now this is quite extreme I know, but it’s just my example. Many women out there don’t realise the importance of choosing your pregnancy and birth team and the effect it can have. Some may not even realise that they can or should do this, but the difference between choosing and not choosing can result in a completely different birth experience, especially when we consider that a team is a group of people working together to achieve a common goal.

It is exactly the same in our health goals. You set your goals in line with the healthy habits spring board; let’s say you have noted that you want to drink more water. How would this relate to choosing a team? You may not need to seek a professional but you could start by telling your household so that they can support you.

It may be that nutrition is on your list of goals and that you need guidance. You could decide to speak to a nutritionist. You may have a coach in place already who can assist with this, or you could look specifically for a health coach who is in tune with your goals and has a similar philosophy. It may be that you are struggling to identify or hone in on the specific areas and goals that you would like to work on. In this case a coach would be extremely useful, as they can work with you to find a starting point, guide you along and help keep you on track.  

Some examples of my health team members, both current and previous, are:


  • ·       Pilates Instructor: Pilates is great for helping to build up your core stability.
  • ·  Chiropractor: Doctors of Chiropractic can ensure that you are free of nerve interference, allowing your body to express itself optimally.
  • ·       MassageTherapist:  Great for soothing those aching muscles and more besides.   
  • ·   EFT: This is great for helping you to relax, focus, and to clear any negative emotions.
  • ·   Personal Trainer: For me, it’s always great to have someone cracking the whip when it comes to exercise.
  • ·      Dentist
  • ·     Optician

Choosing your team can be extended out as far as you see fit. Indeed, if you have identified the need to work on you PMA (positive mental attitude) and that in doing so, you have decided to incorporate meditation, you may need to seek assistance. You may choose attend a class (online or offline). You may choose that you want to learn a new skill as part of this step, or take up an instrument to help you with mindfulness. There are so many avenues you can take, but I do believe having the right people around you is vital for your success an ultimately your health. After all your health is a marathon not a sprint and requires constant work consistent healthy habits.

Monday, May 25, 2020

Are we being conditioned with talk of a new normal?


This week’s blog has been on my mind for many weeks. I have resisted if not shied away from writing this for fear of how you would think of me. Would I be accused of non-conformity? Of not being positive? Of being resistant to change? Would I cause offence? Would people think me insensitive? None of these are my intentions however, I now write this because I believe people are kind enough to respect what others are thinking. So here goes.

Everywhere I turn we are bombarded with the message of this New Normal. We are expected to embrace and almost to accept this is how life is going to be moving forward. This is temporary isn’t it? Or are we all now expected to never touch another human being again?  I am afraid if this is the case then this New Normal can take a running jump! (I have toned this down). Before you all refuse to read any further, I’m a massagetherapist: I believe in the power of human contact.

Touch is such a powerful tool. I’m not a massive hugger, but all I have wanted to do since this started is to hug everyone! Again, this is an innate thing. We innately know that touch has tremendous power: When we comfort a child who has fallen over, we hug them. When we comfort someone who is upset or has had bad news, we use touch to show we care. We hug for good news too: to show we are happy, we are pleased for someone. It is something that we instinctively do. It comforts and consoles. There is power in that hug.

Now at the moment we can’t do any of that, unless that person is in our household. I feel, as sentient human beings, that is a tough ask. It certainly isn’t normal. Personally, I don’t want my subconscious to hear this term New Normal being associated with avoiding other people, avoiding touch. As I say, it is only temporary, isn’t it?

I worry about the message this is sending to our children about being a sensitive human: I don’t feel that the term New Normal is appropriate. Do what you need to do to make this experience more comfortable for you and your family and get through it. But remember, it's just another experience. It is temporary.

When this is all over (and it will end), when we are able to hug and offer a hand of comfort again, are we then going to have to re-train ourselves to re-accept that physical human contact is perfectly normal? I’m not just saying this as me, but as a mum of two young boys who are also hearing this term of New Normal. I feel compelled each time to remind them that these changes are necessary in the short term to help people to feel safe, and yes, they are temporary until we can return to (the true) normal.

So, I respectfully refuse to accept this as Normal. We are simply going through a period of time where we need to make adjustments in ourlives in order to feel safe and protect each other Those adjustments may vary from person to person as we all have different beliefs, experiences and fears.

Wednesday, May 13, 2020

The Pain of Change- Lets check in



A few years back I released a number of short videos each Wednesday morning: The Wellbeing Wednesday series. I started these off at the time with the short story about me in my teens. Throughout my teens, I was fairly active and very much into my Judo, I got injured a few times, dislocated shoulders etc, but I got over it. Although I would eat healthy home cooked meals, I would quite often snack on the junk food; I would have the fizzy drinks, chocolate, crisps etc and very rarely drink water. If I got a headache or quite often a full migraine (which I would get lots of) etc, that was ‘’fine’’, I would just take another pain killer and get on with it.

My sleep wasn’t great, and for many reasons I wasn’t entirely happy. But in this way, I muddled on, I don’t want to bore you with all the details here, but it wasn’t until I was about 25 that I really started to rethink things about my health. Just before this I made the change from banking to retail and had begun a short-lived career in a popular clothes shop. Up until this point I had been working surrounded by people who to be honest were quite unfriendly towards each other. They were gossipy about each other and rude and would often say hurtful things about other people, so not at all supportive.  I’m sure you have all had experience of how these environments can affect your mood or emotions. Needless to say, alongside migraines, I was feeling an incredible amount of emotional stress. It wasn’t long before I began to realise that something needed change and quickly.

I wasn’t on social media at the time as it wasn’t as big then, and not really having a clue where to begin, I started by reading back through old college notes and assignments from my Health and Social Care course. I began to read more books, and write journals. Although I began to feel better, I still dreaded going into work and still had migraines though. After a couple of months, I felt compelled to attend a craft fair, I have absolutely no idea why, I’m not in the least bit talented or interested in that area. I’m not a craft person, but whilst browsing, I met a group of people from a private health clinic and began we talking. Things started to make more sense to me and a few days later I embarked on a different journey, this time towards health. I entered a completely different career and began working in private vitalistic healthcare. I changed my lifestyle, began to learn new ways to be healthy and grow and even began to look at how I could help others with their health. I began to feel happier still, healthy and experience less and less symptoms. I was no longer surrounded by negativity and people gossiping and putting each other down. I had found people who wanted to help, wanted others to succeed. I had found my health, my life and my tribe. It wasn’t completely plain sailing, don’t get me wrong on that, I had to make a lot of changes, cut a lot out of my life that was not helping me grow. I had to push out of a few comfort zones and feel the pain of change.

One book I read years ago was Who Moved My Cheese. This is a great book for anyone going through change of any description. Its not too intense and until recently I still had this book and would read it often when approaching change. We would often give it to our team members to read as well.

Even back then we were in a world where we were surrounded by short cuts; microwave meals, junk food, diet pills, TV and the beginnings of social media. We don’t have to make our own entertainment. It is now all there for us on demand. This is like anything good and bad, but it’s the on-demand part that is concerning. Health isn’t can’t be on demand, you can’t quick fix it, you can’t take the magic pill and it all go away, it is an ongoing process. I know now that if I don’t keep in check with my habits, I begin to slowly slip back, I start getting headaches and migraines again, my stress levels go up and I soon become ill.

I realised after a while that to be healthy requires a lot of effort, you need to reduce the bad habits and focus on those which are going to improve and maintain your health. You need to feel the pain of change that will take you from that state of survive to thrive.

Back to the present: We have had 7 weeks of lock down, and if like me you have also had the added rollercoaster that is home schooling your children alongside other commitments. I started my first blog with an introduction to the 7 Habits of Health and a scorecard. What if you were to take time out now and look back on this, to check in on your progress. Where do you still need to work on? Do you need help with any of them? It can be painful. It can be challenging, but although we are social distancing we can still help in many ways.

What one thing can you do today to grow and nurture your body, and then again tomorrow and the day after...?

Wednesday, May 6, 2020

Reconnecting with You


I spoke a few weeks ago about our body's own healing system, the innate intelligence that we are all born with and the role it plays in our lives. Some of you may remember I mentioned that we are all born to be healthy and thrive; to achieve our own optimum. At the moment it can be hard to figure out what that optimum is for us, it’s a challenge to understand and re-connect with ourselves with everything else going on around us. At times the ‘noise’ (see my previous blogs) can be quite overwhelming.

You may be in a place where you know what you need to do but can’t seem to find yourself in the right circumstances to do it. That’s okay, for the moment anyway, but not for long. So, when you are ready to push on, or when you need to simply quieten that noise can what can you do?

One method I have spoken about previously is EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) this is great for clearing any negative emotions and I often show people how to use this. It’s so gentle that even children can use it.

Another method for re-connection that I like is this one:
  1. 1    Take yourself right away, into a different room from everyone else, or even in the garden if the weather is great and no one else is out there.
  2. 2    Find a good space where you can lie down. (The grass is a great option or floor or bed). Lay flat looking up at the sky/ceiling or out of the window if the position allows. Keep your arms at your sides with palms facing upwards.
  3. 3.      Now focus on the sky/ceiling for a few moments.
  4. 4.     Take a breath in through your nose for a count of 5.
  5. 5.     Breathe out through your mouth for a count of 5.
  6. 6.     Repeat a few times.
  7. 7.   Now close your eyes and repeat the same exercise. This time however ask yourself, your innate intelligence, either out loud or in your head ‘what do I need right now? Or ‘What is the most important thing right now?’ Remember to pause and breathe. This may seem a bit strange the first few times and it does take practice. You may get a clear answer at once or you may be thinking this is a bit weird, but please persevere.
  8. 8.     Once you have done this a few times, open your eyes when you are ready to do so. When you are ready slowly stand or sit up.
  9. 9.     You may feel you that you need to write something down, or you may not. Or you may want to draw. What ever is the right way for you, that is fine.
  10. 10. Finally have a glass of water. Reconnecting is thirsty business and it is important to keep hydrated. Do this as often as you like and remember to listen to what your body is telling you.


The above method is great not only in times of emotional stress, but physical stress too. Again, this can easily be used with children, but please allow them to fidget slightly while they are lying down, they are children and often don’t stay still! From a young age I have used a version of this with our boys to help them work out what they need and to recognise when they are having a health experience (yes I am that odd parent that has specific language I use with our children I'm afraid- sorry I should have warned you - you may call it symptoms or sickness).

I wouldn’t recommend doing this for the first time if your child is in the process of being sick, that is not the best time to start. You can however introduce it to them slowly. Let them know that you are working on connecting them with their body’s healing system (innate intelligence). Show them what you have been doing and talk to them about the 7 Habits of Health (Exercise, Sleep, PMA, Hydration, Nutrition, Vit D/ Sunlight and Mind body connection). Explain the importance of these in our health, if you need any help with this please contact me. You could simply encourage your child by asking ‘what does your body need now?’ at different moments throughout the day to get them used to that way of thinking. Be prepared though for answers such as chocolate ice cream or cake; it’s worth a try right?! When they are used to this you can start using it when they are experiencing any challenge.

As this is something that our boys are familiar with and are used to doing, they can now confidently tell me that they need water as they have a slight headache or that they need to exercise as their muscles feel tight. This is a great skill to have developed and I honestly believe that by encouraging it now, it will make for a much healthier adult population in years to come. I do have to tell you though, I do still occasionally get the ‘chocolate cake’ answer, and that is fine, my children are normal, and obviously not feeling sick at that point in time!

For those adults who are new to this, you are doing great. It’s so hard changing habits and sticking to them especially right now, when it seems that there is so much temptation to stick with our comfort zones, but as I said, you are doing great. Take the time to reconnect with your innate, ask what it needs, listen and make the lifestyle changes you need, don’t wait any longer.

Tuesday, April 28, 2020

Timetable for Health


One of the important steps we discuss with people in our centre is the importance of having a timetable or schedule. Usually we would see many parents and families in our centre, all with busy lives, clubs, work, school, home, exercise and other commitments. A timetable/schedule/planner is a great ingredient when balancing life and health goals. It’s true that as I write this, we are in lock down and not going out to attend regular meet-ups, groups etc, which does mean that many of our usual activities have had to adopt a different format or be postponed. Initially for many people, this understandably bought about a lot of confusion as packed diaries suddenly became null and void (at least to begin with). All schedules and plans were sent into turmoil.

A few years ago, we had a really tense and challenging start to the summer holidays with the boys. We had a holiday planned, but not until the end. We were working up until that point. After about 10 days in I realised what the problem was: I hadn’t thought to timetable the summer holidays. We had the basics in place, but because we hadn’t worked out when we were going to exercise, or who was going to work and when it turned into a free for all, with us trying to entertain the boys and work at the same time. Once we realised this and arranged our timetable, things ran a lot smoother and we got the things done that we needed to whilst having a great summer. Since then I have always ensured that timetables cover holidays as well (to a certain extent). (We even joked last year that I had planned-in spontaneity into our holidays).

I now rely on my timetable and have done for many years. I colour code, draw and include the whole family for the week. It’s how we know who needs to be where and when, who is taking them etc. It also includes, for example, time to ensure everyone gets exercise time. It has the 7 Habits7habitsofhealth.blogspot.com factored in. For the first week of lock down I really missed having this, until I realised I just needed to adapt. I do actually believe though that there has never been a more important time to introduce, or continue to have, a planner.

We are all having to spend a lot more time in the house together and where possible continue about our daily lives. It can be a really stressful time as we are trying to juggle working from home with home schooling and maintain a healthy lifestyle along with our family relationships. Emotions can be challenging at times, but having some sort of routine will help. Trying to keep a routine may seem a little pointless and impossible but actually I feel it is necessary for health reasons. We all like to feel that we are accomplishing something and that we are making the best use of our time, and developing a planner will help.

Usually I would develop our timetable at the start of each school term; that way any changes in after-school clubs can be easily added. It can be changed at any time though.

If we think back to our time at school, we all had to work to a timetable e.g. Monday 9am Maths, 10am Biology and so on. This continues on into higher education and for some of us into our working lives. 

So, what if we were to look at doing the same with our own planners?

1.     List all the jobs/ events etc you currently do each day.
2.     List all the things that you want to fit in but don’t feel you can. This may be reading, Date Night, going for a walk...
3.     Check back to your scorecard from the 7 Habits of Health (found in my blog post The 7Habits of Health 29/03/20). Are they any action points that need including e.g. daily meditation, early morning exercise, daily music practice etc.
4.     Is there anything on list one that you can get someone else to do/ help with?
5.     Place all items onto a timetable. “Fun” stuff first. See over page for example.
6.     Tell your family what you are doing so they are aware and run with this for a week or so. If something needs a slight amendment then go for it, but stick with it. It will make all the difference to your time.

N:B Be aware of logistics such as who needs the computer/laptop and when. At the moment everything is being done remotely and this means more computer time which can cause frustration if everyone needs to use them at the same time.

Tips when working out your schedule

1.     You will find that some tasks have to be done on specific days eg, kids clubs etc. Put these in first.
2.     As much as possible plan the schedule to how you want it to look. If it looks complety different do two then compare and plan to move to the ideal.
3.     Make sure you schedule in a date night as well, even if you don’t go out, which we can’t do at the moment, simply watch a film or attend a virtual quiz.
4.     Don’t be put off by the initial organisation involved, once done it will make a world of difference.
5.     Be prepared to alter it over time as the family’s lifestyle and needs change. It will obviously need changing again soon once the lock down has been lifted and we have more freedom.

I have included below a simple design template that I started out with. Using this design each family member is given a different colour. I also use a diary and journal when planning. Now though my timetable is set to start at 6am each day and finish at 10pm. Please note though I do not always fill every single hour with something. There does need to be an element of flexibility, and you need to be able to adapt when needs- be. Especially when you have children around.

Now I also plan in things like what we are going to eat for the week to save time when shopping and also each day at meal times. Obviously at the moment shopping is a bit more of a challenge though, but it can be done.


Early
AM
Lunch
PM
Eve
Mon





Tues





Weds





Thurs





Fri





Sat





Sun






So, get organising and creative with your planning factor in your 7 Habits of Health for the entire family. Starting now will give you a great start. Enjoy. And let me know how you get on.

Tuesday, April 21, 2020

You were born to be healthy


If you have been reading my blog posts over the last few weeks, you may remember that I have spent some time talking about Positive Mental Attitude (PMA), what that actually means and why it is important to our health. Through talking to many of you over the recent weeks, I registered your fears, frustrations and anxieties among many other negative emotions that we are challenged with at the current time. I have seen immense chaos, panic and confusion. What I really need to tell you now is vitally important to your health journey: ‘You were born to be healthy.’

What I mean by the above statement is that every single one of us has our own health potential. Yes, I appreciate that sometimes there are things that are out of our control, but we still have that potential. We still have our own inbuilt healing system, our innate intelligence. I realise for many people this is a new different concept. I say that because I first realised that many of us didn’t fully understand this concept around 10 years ago. I had been giving a series of talks at secondary schools about the spine, nervous system and importance of posture in relation to health and healing. It was the healing part that was causing confusion and not just among the children. The misconception I was seeing was that if you are injured, sick, unwell, you need to either take something or have some kind of surgical intervention to heal. I’m not talking serious illness or injury, please note. At first, I thought I was not clear, and tried out the example of falling and grazing a knee, I got the participants to talk me through what would happen. The general consensus was that if you put a plaster on the cut it would heal the cut. At that point I realised that I take for granted how much we all understand and appreciate the amazing body that we live in.   

A few years after this I spent a short spell in hospital when Isaac was born. During this time, I was able to truly appreciate and deepen my understanding of innate intelligence. I spent most of my stay there consumed by fear. There were a few challenges but my fear kept me from overcoming them. Until I was able to regain control of that fear, I was stuck. I read, I did what I could to shut off the rest of the chaos in the hospital ward, I got access to fruit and vegetables, I did EFT and I meditated. Eventually I was able to listen to the inner voice that said, it’s okay I’ve got this. Call me mad, but I do believe that was innate telling me it was in control, I just simply needed to continue to provide the right environment and let it get to work.

If you are unsure about all this by the way, you only have to look at babies and young children to see it in action. They simply ooze with it. They are constantly developing, learning, growing, healing. Its non-stop innate on display. This was one of the reasons that I then began the Oscar Ocean series. I felt that if we could start talking to children at a young age about how to be healthy how to look after their bodies from the inside out, how to start taking that responsibility from a young age, then they would grow into adults who would could truly achieve their health potential. I wanted them to understand the importance of the 7 Habits of Health and that their choices and actions really do affect their health.

Anyway, back to my story, I then spent some time explaining what this innate intelligence was and how it was the action of this that would heal the grazed knee. How when we have a reaction to dust for example and we sneeze; that is innate intelligence creating that response to ensure that we get rid of what the body does not need, what may potentially be harmful. If we perhaps eat something that we haven’t cooked correctly and are subsequently sick; that is our innate intelligence again removing it from our system. If we touch something hot and immediately pull our hand away, again innate intelligence. All of the above are mechanisms designed to help us to not just survive, but thrive.

Regardless of our beliefs about how we cam to be as a species, innate intelligence in there inside everyone of us doing its thing every day, helping is grow, heal, survive and thrive. There is a catch though; innate can only do the job if you give it the correct environment, if you provide the correct ingredients. Right now, there is so much around us attempting to make us believe that the human body is physically weak, and yes there is a problem, but let’s look at this from a different perspective. This is happening because fear breeds fear and negativity breeds negativity. The abundance of fear and negativity can only do one thing, take our power and keep us in a place of weakness. When we are in a state of stress whether its physical, chemical or emotional, it lowers our immune function and we become more susceptible to illness.

We need to get back to what I said at the start we are born to be healthy. Born to thrive. Let’s start getting back to the basics, and looking to what’s inside us that makes us healthy. We are not flawed or weak. When we have symptoms, it is a sign that this awesome intelligence inside is doing what it does best, taking care of us and working to the best of its ability. And yes, sometimes it does need help. What if instead of fearing our bodies, we looked at them in wonder and awe at what they can achieve. What if we chose a different approach took that power away from fear and instead channeled it towards being healthy and learning to thrive. After all, you were born to be healthy.


Monday, April 13, 2020

The True PMA


My blog last week focused on the 6th Habit of health- PMA (Positive Mental Attitude), why this is important to our health, and my method for taking back control of emotions. You may or may not have put it to the test, maybe you haven’t needed to. If you have needed to use this method, I would love to hear from you. I hope it has made a difference, and offered you some comfort and empowerment.

I thought I would take some time this week to look into the concept of PMA in a bit more detail. To look at what it actually means. The reason for this is I find there is often a misconception regarding PMA, the idea is often not fully understood and therefore the person practicing PMA can be doing themselves more harm than good. To explain, I have previously had both patients and team members who, when coaching have told me that a positive mental attitude means the following: being happy all the time and/or maintaining that you are okay/ happy/ healthy even when you are not. There are many occasions when I have done the above (I don’t think I am alone here) but this is not PMA. That is creating an illusion to oneself, not wanting to ask for help, not feeling able to ask or discuss or address anxieties. This is nothing to be ashamed of, but it’s a distinctly different concept.

I touched on the real PMA in my last blog, when I mentioned about the relevance of the link between emotional health and physical health. The fact that healthy, happy upbeat thoughts produce neuropeptides and the body’s need for these chemicals for repair and healing. Simply pretending things are okay will not make it so. There is no truth there, you are simply masking over the problem. Saying you are happy without the conviction will not make it so. There is, like everything, more to it. At this point, I want to address the statement about PMA meaning "being happy all the time" because this is not healthy. (Hopefully you will all know that, it goes without saying). It is absolutely normal to not be happy all the time. It is normal to be angry, sad, afraid, anxious or any emotion you may feel. It is completely normal and natural to have  negative emotions and it is my firm belief that you need to feel these at certain points in your life.

Negative emotions on some level are healthy, and perfectly acceptable. The however part though is this, if you feel this way all the time, over a long period of time or every time you have a particular encounter; that is the unhealthy part. That will hold you back and hold you in a place where you are not nourishing your PMA habit. This will affect health as previously mentioned and will hold you in a place where you are not growing.

Last week I outlined my method for taking back control of my emotions so after acknowledging and experiencing, you can take back the power and can move forward and grow. There are other important factors that also need addressing here and that I call the ‘noise.’ The noise is all the other stuff going on around you that contributes to the negative feelings. The noise is tempting, it can come in many forms and it is designed to pull you in and away from your purpose. We can’t control all of the noise, but we can control or dampen down some of it. So, what is this noise? As I said it is many things but here are a few examples:

·        The News- This is a massive bug-bear of mine. It used to be that we would watch the 10pm news before bed (not ideal but anyway!) and that would be it. As if that wasn’t bad enough, now there is no escape. It is everywhere, we can’t even watch television without news interrupting the advert breaks. It’s 24 hours of non-stop doom and gloom, sucking us in, getting us to download apps so we get updates of the doom which we feel compelled to read at all hours. Do you get the feeling that I am not a fan? It’s not great if you are worried, stressed and anxious to begin with. The simple act of avoiding the news can make a difference and is the first thing I tell patients to do.
·        Social Media- The short answer is to avoid, for similar reasons to the above. There is also the pressure to respond to notifications/ posts straight away and it’s easy to lose track of time while trying to find out what is happening in everyone else’s life.
·        Other people’s social lives- It’s so easy to get caught up in what everyone else is doing and what challenges they are facing. Obviously, we need to be there in times of need for family and friends, but often there are things we are concerned about for them that we don’t need. There are times where we are more concerned for others then they are for themselves. This is not healthy.
·        Apps- I again touched on this above, we have apps on our phones and tablets, they are constantly pinging to let us know something. Often, we feel the pressure to respond straight away. We get sucked in and our attention is taken by what else is going on.

There are many more items of ‘noise’ but these are just a few of them. I am also acutely aware that many of us are relying on these at the moment whilst we are working from home or isolated from friends and family or have limited face to face human contact. It’s a challenging and worrying time for everyone. Reducing some of your exposure to ‘noise’ will help, at the very least avoid the news especially before going to bed. You could also have a clear out of your apps, turn off notifications, select what you respond to and start filtering through negative information.

Start protecting your PMA by distancing yourself from negativity and actively seek things, people, aspects that inspire and bring you joy. Listen to inspirational speakers, read inspiring books, create, meditate, whatever you need to do to bring that positive glow back to you. This will boost your positive mental attitude and bring you one step closer to your health goals. This is where you start accumulating the power to control how you react and feel. The power to improve your health starts from within and you are in control.

Sunday, April 5, 2020

Taking Control of Your Emotional Health


My blog last week introduced The 7 Habits of Health and how you can use the habits to make positive changes. We all know nobody is the same and we have different needs where health is concerned, so there is no specific order that they are listed in. There is however, one particular habit that I have been especially mindful of this last week. As I write this, the UK along with many other countries in the world have been placed in ‘lock down’. Movements are restricted, personal contact with anyone outside of our own home is forbidden unless at what is considered to be a safe distance (2m). We are all having to adapt and make changes at an alarming rate. I don’t need to go on, we are all living it. 


That is just the issue here though, "living": are we thriving or are we simply surviving? During the first week of lockdown, I had the revelation that I was feeling something that I had not felt since my time in hospital quite some years ago. I felt trapped, afraid, alone, claustrophobic and more besides. I realised I was anxious, not of being or becoming ill, but of the entire situation. When I tapped into those feelings one thing came to mind, and I remembered something important about my personality: I have to be in control. Maybe you can relate to that? If I’m not in control, I panic. I feel lost and all those feelings I mentioned above build up.  There many physical indicators of that too: My chest and shoulders feel tight, and I find it difficult to take a deep breath for example. These are feelings of anxiety and are among what are known as "negative emotions". Negative emotions hold us back, they prevent us from achieving, thriving and can ultimately affect our health and wellbeing. 


Studies are now beginning to show the important link between mind (our emotional health) and body (our physical health). When the mind is regularly thinking of healthy, happy up-beat thoughts, it produces chemicals called neuropeptides. The body is very dependent upon having a regular supply of these chemicals in order to heal tissues and cells. What we choose to fill our mind with is similar to choosing what software to install on your computer.  Function and efficiency of your computer will obviously be affected as a result of this.

Have you ever heard the quote by Paulette Sedgwick (and attributed to others), "Be careful of your thoughts, for your thoughts become your words. Be careful of your words, for your words become your actions. Be careful of your actions, for your actions become your habits."


This is where the sixth habit comes in: Positive Mental Attitude (PMA). Those negative feelings I have talked about above, do not constitute a healthy habit. It is impossible though to simply snap out of it. Things aren’t as easy as that. In my case where the issue is control, I have to recognise that at the moment there is a situation that none of us can control. I just have to accept and choose how I react, and what we do. That is where we all have real control.There are many ways we can look to take back control of our reaction and reframe our mindset: 


  • ·        Journaling
  • ·        Meditation
  • ·        Mindfulness
  • ·        EFT 
  • ·        Go for a walk, exercise or stretch
  • ·        Create/ update your vision board
  • ·        Goal setting
  • ·        Gratitude list


There are many more besides. What I also find works really well with any negative issue is to carry out the following process:


1.     Recognise: Once you have recognised the presence of negative emotions, take some time to experience them. What I mean by this is allow them, recognise them but don’t let them take over. I find a great way when working with people is to do a spider diagram or just brainstorm.

2.     Show Gratitude: Strange as it may seem, say to yourself thank you for allowing me to feel this … Now I can grow and move on from here.

3.     EFT: This is a gentle tapping method I have used in practice for many years now. It helps to clear the negative emotions. It is simple and easy to use and I often coach patients to use this method outside of the clinic whenever they need to. Please see my earlier video or contact me for further information.

4.    Grow: Have you ever noticed in young children that when they have a period of illness, this is often followed by growth? I like to view negative emotions in this way. Obviously, we don’t want them to linger or to control us, but once we have the control back, we are in a place of strength and can grow. We often find the solution for ourselves so that we can move forward to a place of strength. 


It is also important to remember that just because an emotion is referred to as negative, it does not mean that we are wrong in any way to be feeling that way. Whatever it is we feel, that is absolutely right for us, but we need to recognise and take back control so that we can lead a healthier and fuller life; to thrive and not simply survive. Maybe you are feeling or have felt similar feelings at the moment? I would love to hear from you and how I can help you with your 7 Habits of Health.